I got intimate with my husband’s friend and we both are really embarrassed now
27th March 2019
Query: I have been married for more than three years and I have done a terrible mistake. Though I really love and respect my husband but like every couple, we also fight over little things. But from past eight months, we had started feeling bored in our relationship and felt a little awkward. Meanwhile, I developed a crush on my husband’s close friend and we ended up having sex a few days back. Now, both of us are feeling very guilty and even ignore seeing each other’s face. I am confused how I should deal with this situation. Should I confess what happened to my husband? Would he love and trust me again? Also, his friend is willing to break all the ties from us and not stay in touch in future. Please suggest something. —By Anonymous
Response by Ms. Aanchal Bhatnagar: Thank you for sharing your painful dilemma with us. With so many relationships at stake, I can imagine how confusing it must be for you. Perhaps, your intimacy with your husband’s friend doesn’t sound simply sexual. It has also filled an emotional gap that you otherwise felt in your marriage.
The moments of boredom and disconnect that you highlighted are equally a major concern and a probable cause. You can always choose to dismiss whatever has happened, however, this seems to be a product of a larger problem in your relationship, which you and your husband need to work through as a couple. Telling him the truth comes with its own consequences; nonetheless, it will bring you all together on the same page to work on these underlying damaging issues.
I appreciate your love for your husband and your desire to fix everything. Perhaps, having your husband’s involvement in this ‘fixing’ is the most suitable idea. I wish you all the support and warmth in the rough patch that lies ahead, and hope for the strength in your relationship.
- Ms. Aanchal Bhatnagar is a Relationship Therapist at IWill Therapy app by EpsyClinic
Want expert advice for your relationship? Send us a mail at expertadvice.toi@gmail.com
Source: indiatimes.com