Query: Hi, I am a 28-year-old woman and the only child in my family. I personally feel my parents are not compatible partners and there entire life has been a compromise. They always feared what society would say if get separated. Plus, they wanted to give me the perfect childhood and in fact, I am the only reason they are still together. Once I saw my mother crying after having a fight with him and I asked her to take a divorce. She agreed she is not happy with him but said divorce is not an option. My house is full of negativity and I can't see my parents simply dragging their life. What should I do? —By Anonymous

Response by Ms. Rachana Awatramani: Relationship between parents has long-lasting impact on a child’s mind. Therefore, many couples do not opt for a divorce assuming it is good for their children to have both their parents. However, children observe and sense the uneasiness between parents very easily.
I comprehend that you are a 28-year-old woman and the only child of your parents. I understand that it can be difficult to see your parents unhappy with each other. You mentioned that they are not compatible but are living together due to societal pressure. Also, they always wanted to raise you together. You are feeling guilty as you think you are the only reason they are still together.
Firstly, it is your parents’ choice to decide whether they want a divorce or want to live together. Secondly, you can express your feelings to your parents. Lastly, you can also consider family therapy and individual counselling for yourself which can help you cope with your emotions.

Relationships have their own challenges. As parents, they work as a team for you. And as a couple and as adults, they will have to make their own choices. You must respect that and give them space to decide for themselves.

- Ms. Rachana Awatramani is a Counseling Psychologist at Insight Counseling Services in Mumbai

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Source: indiatimes.com