I met Agnes Atayila about two decades ago. I was an undergraduate student then. It was during one of the long vacations, and, it coincided with preparations towards local assembly elections. You see, I loved to work during the long vacations. Working during the long vacation was not only fun for me, but it was also an opportunity for me to be useful to my society, learn new things and earn some money for school. So I loved to work and I loved to earn my own money. I also loved to meet people, share ideas, share knowledge and learn something new. I wasn’t one to socialize a lot. But I certainly enjoyed rich discussions and challenging work. That was how I met an amazing woman. A woman who personified dignity, courage, focus, determination, confidence, and more.

This particular long vacation was one of my most exciting vacations because my friends and I had landed ourselves a holiday job. This time, we had been engaged by a non-governmental organization to assist women who were contesting the local assembly elections as Assemblywomen. I was assigned to two women, and one of them was Madam Agnes Atayila. I liked her upon seeing her.

It felt mutual. Madam Agnes Atayilla had this quiet assurance about her. She didn’t speak much, but her demeanour said a lot.  It seemed to say, “I am a woman who is proud to be a woman, and who knows what she wants, and who knows what she is about”.  Her every step was confidence in herself. And, her smile seemed to say “I am here, and yes, I am a woman”.

I would go with her to her house. It was a nice house, and, I was told she owned it. It was the nicest house in her neighbourhood. In a region where women hardly owned land, I was intrigued that this woman-owned one of the nicest homes in her neighbourhood. She had her own business too. I would watch her call the shots, quietly, confidently. Like a woman.

I would go with Madam Atayila to some of her ‘rallies’ and listen to her tell her people what she had already done to improve their community, and what more she was willing to do. At one such rally, a man came to perform. At her “rally”. He was certainly not invited by Madam Agnes Atayila’s campaign team. No. This man appeared to have been hired by one of Madam Atayila’s opponents to perform at this ‘rally’.

He took the stage, uninvited, and started performing all by himself while playing his ‘koliko’ (two-stringed calabash lute). This man was definitely talented in playing the koliko, and he had a great voice for singing. He was drunk. Very drunk. He unleashed his talent melodiously, but the words he sang were anything but melodious to my ears. He reigned insults in the form of a song on my candidate. Sung of what a whore this woman is. I cannot, for decorum repeat the words of this man. I cannot even repeat them in private. Yes, they were that scandalous. And, the sum of these words were more or less “how dare she”.

This was the first time I was witnessing an adult insult another adult, and nothing had prepared me for this. Nothing had prepared me to see an adult woman being denigrated by another adult if even a drunk. My world darkened, and I was shaking. I was horrified and saw right before my eyes, this man undoing all of our hard work on this election – with his talent in song. Madam Atayila meanwhile sat there seemingly unconcerned, as though this man didn’t call her by name, and rain unprintable invectives on her. On seeing that I was shaking, and probably wanted to do something, (I don’t know what), Madam Atayila reached out her hand, held my hand, smiled at me and said to me “let him be”.

This woman sat there calmly as if this man was not performing at her rally uninvited. She sat there as if she did not hear the invectives being directed at her, and when the man was done, she asked that he be offered some of the local pito that she was serving her guests. She then took the stage, calmly continued with her address, reminded the people what she had already done for her community, assured them what more she was willing to do, and ever so calmly, reminded them she did these things, is capable of doing more, and they know it. She let them know why she deserved to be voted for as their Assemblywoman.

As if nothing had happened. I turned from rage to amusement and admiration. When we got back to her house, I asked her how she was able to remain calm and collected in the light of the unprintable insults rained on her. She noted nonchalantly – she was used to it. She told me that the very people who came to beg her for food, and who she gives this food to, are also some of those who come to publicly insult her. She told me, that the man who insulted her that mid-morning, would certainly come to her house in the evening to ask for food, and she would give him. She told me she takes it in her stride and lets it go.

Madam Atayila went on to win the election. We were all very happy. She would win many other elections. And, she would become the Presiding member of Bolgatanga Municipal Assembly. She symbolized focus, determination and sheer hard work. Hers was the face of courage and kindness.

This was a woman who held her own, who loved her community, and who was willing to work even harder for her community. Hers was not a world that indulged women who dared to lead. She did all the same, and she led. Her calm demeanour was as though to say, “I have a right to be here, and to lead”. Without surrender, she did what she could to be on good terms with everybody.

Madam Agnes Atayila, the news of your death breaks my heart. Particularly because in as much as I hate to have to say this, you are one of the women I put down to visit again for a chat but wasn’t able to. A huge baobab tree has fallen.

Madam Atayila, 21-gun salute to you. Madam Atayila, tan nom mei mei.